what an incredible curse it is to be fully aware of one’s affliction, but unable to escape it. to understand what it is you lack but to be incapable of compensating, to understand where you have excess but being too greedy to cut down. one who is not aided or encouraged by their dreams, but helplessly dependent on them and the fantastical false optimism they provide. someone who tells themselves that there’s “no escape” as they witness the open doors around them all slowly close. cowardice and inaction; never pushing forward and therefore convincing that they must have never wanted to in the beginning anyway. the curse of accelerating your own natural deterioration. just do it to yourself.
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